p.s. i still have seen nothing of the alledged hundred either.

hey piece of shit... i hope the doctor slips... you are the worst kind of scam artist... tinkler that is 2000 dollars you owe me not a hundred you fucking shit head... thats besides the 5000-6000 in smoke... calculate it asshole.... you fucking shit for brains... oh and you're the one that deserves to be able to party, once agaibn getting out of the shit you put me in i haven't eaten in three days... nothing "had to happen" asshole.... you created all of this , and i hate you.... you are a fuckwad... and the only sorry i'll listen to comes after you post on your blog i am an asshole, i lied to jazz, i lied to viv... and i lie to everyone io meet to disparage you because i am on to the next needy person i can mooch off of...... oh and i would like some shoes too, dick for brains.

what i'm trying to say is that you're right(about where we are) but you're wrong(about how to get anywhere else) henry miller... our pain is the only thing keeping the world from self destructing.

what i'm trying to say is that you're right(about where we are) but you're wrong(about how to get anywhere else) henry miller... our pain is the only thing keeping the world from self destructing.

I’m learning.......the world is always going to shit.... that is mostly because "[y]ou have to realize [Mark] me boy, that you’re dealing with cutthroats, with cannibals, only they’re dressed up, shaved, perfumed, but that’s all they are--cutthroats, cannibals. The best thing for you to do now, [Mark], is to go and get yourself a frosted chocolate and when you sit at the soda fountain keep your eyes peeled and forget about the destiny of man because you might still find yourself a nice lay and a good lay will clean your ballbearings out and leave a good taste in your mouth whereas this only brings on dyspepsia, dandruff, halitosis, encephalitis."
so I really don’t mind if I do, and with out you when they ask for a dime, now I’ll have enough to giv’em a dollar.
and that’s the reason it never gets there because we can all do ten times what we are asked and maybe one in ten will.

p.s tinkler if i see you i owe you a couple of shots to the face for when you agreed that if you ever stepped on my toe on purpose again i would punch you in the face, because that's how much it hurt, and you did it anyway, well guess what, ow, now i'm going to collect, remember this convo too? or no..... anyway, you'd better fucking stay the fuck out of my way from now on or after i drop you i'm going to keep kicking you on the ground. thanks for proving to me that which i thought was impossible. Instead of teaching you and your sister that life isn't fair so you may as well be, they taught you life isn't fair, so make sure you come out on top... fine, i just don't feel like listening to your fucking bullshit anymore. the proof is in the pudding and you are rapidly congealing into a spoiled brat.

fuck this feels really fucking good, i was pretty scared that letting go of needing people to tell you what is okay would be what turned me into a business bastard, or an apathetic capatalist but it hasn't changed a fucking thing, i just feel so much fucking calmer... hey tinkler fuck right off... EVERYONE watch out for that one, he will feel no remorse. EAT ME EVERYONE, i will always keep up my share, i'll do (at least) half of the house work, so why have i let the excess fall to those who don't want to do anything, those who rather than feel guilt when they drive their best friends into bankruptcy, feel resentful of the cash flow restriction. i'm a gonna be spending my cash on people who are trying to be human.

well i'm not pissed anymore cuz i realized i will have money saved soon what with cutting you off from everything so i don't even care tinkler. with friends like you, who needs em, phffft... this is going to make things easier, it will be much more fun to give things to people who need them, in order to do so, i'm going to have to remain more objective thus lenore... ban people, i'm really sick to death of all this bullshit. i have no friends, i'm going to keep things more strictly to an; it makes me happy, it makes me feel shitty basis, tinkler you have always gone out of your way to make me feel shitty... thank you, that was just far enough for me to realize.... i don't care about you tinkler, not anymore, not after everything, i can put up with a lazy child, not an asshole. I just don't like you at all anymore and i'm not ashamed to finally say i was wrong to everyone that told me the entire time i knew you to watch it, i've got it now, i was wrong, you aren't a good guy scared to get a job and such, scared to grow up, you are a jerk, i'll never get anything but more and more problems. well i was a pretty good start to screwing people over wasn't i, once it gets to be more than you think you can ever repay, you become resentful, i understand, and i don't care, not realizing this and just stopping, that's what makes you an asshole. not just dealing with the shit circles you make in everyone's crops, that is what will make you like your sister.

there is only camaraderie between thieves ... remember that viv, remember that jazz even... have fun with him... hopefully me laying his cards on the table will be enough to keep him from quitting in a week .... enjoy the bullshit while it lasts because it leaves an awful taste in your mouth when it’s gone. it is time for me to do things fo me fo once.

the only thing ever wrong with me was thinking there was.
the thing that is wrong with you is that you know... you know that’s the only thing wrong with me so you try and make it as big as you can instead of making that feeling of wanting me to feel worse smaller. why don’t you add up the hours I’ve wasted ruining you making you lazier, working like a dog making myself even smaller...the difference between me and you is that I say it.. I say hey tinkler... I obviously was dependent on your validation so you can’t keep coming around and saying your hungry, because even though I knew thoroughly that you would be eating properly before me... I still shared half of what I owned with you.... forget it tinkler... come to me when you are willing to see yourself as my equal. (oh god which way did he mean that?.... both)

can you tell the difference between coincidence and consequence? between sabateur and attacker? between trivia and imperical data?

can you tell the difference between coincidence and consequence? between sabateur and attacker? between trivia and imperical data?

oy tinkler, your favorite game of fuck mark hasn't worked because i don't care anymore, now you're going to be fucking yourself and anyone dumb enough to stay around you.

you see viv i never asked for anythig back, i'm not being petty... you were by pretending i was... you can all go fuck yourselves, pour vrai since i heard tinkler you let everyone know you feel like rutting (by the way everyone, it was steph before, even after i was seeing her.... "ah fuck, steph, i have a crush on steph, why am i going out with viv") you're acting like a spoiled mamas boy who needs everyone else to worry, either do something or leave it alone ... have fun just the three of you unconcious extroverts. i'm sure after the group settles into three the dynamic won't change again, and since you're all such blameless(feigning oblivious) folks you'll have fun. i must be fucking crazy cuz you have all been just so nice to me.

you are all assholes, and full of shit, yuno-y? Tinkler has had 3 times as many new pairs of shoes and skateboards during the time he's been owing me this two grand... fuck you tinkler, why are there holes in my shoes and not in yours.....fuck..... and viv speaking of small amounts of alcohol: the last beer and a half i never finish from my forty before we go out, i end up splitting with at least three people... you can fuck off too.

you know what is MEAN assholes... stealing off your best friend after he's given your everything he could afford... whats better is stealing from your friend and acting like a grumpy baby because you know you are too much of an asshole to even be nice to me... i mean then you'd have to admit to yourself.... yah the mean one is me.... wow viv explain to me how i worked like twenty shifts in row so tinkler couldn't pay me back... go fuck yourself.... wow i had a nervous breakdown... thanks for forgetting tinkler... FUCK YOU. i never asked for cash i asked to be treated like a human being... i never asked for my drink powder back and you know it. what you weren't drunk enough?, shame. i hope the extra 20ml of alcohol you got not sharing with me did something, you fucking cunts.

tinkler you know perfectly well what you've been up to, so go fuck yourself.

ban people

human beings are themselves composed of several consciousness' of no actual relation but each influenced only via the other.

some causing(creation would imply control, different from intent) meaning, the others mean to cause,
unfortunately each has been thoroughly convinced it is embarrassed(the embarrassement) of the others.

yo boys acting too tough, girls acting too much....... can you actually sit there and tell me that jealousy exists? can you tell me greed does too? show me an over confident kid that wants only what someone else has. show me the security that has made you grip tighter, given you this need for ownership.... why teach only to fear the fear. succomb to the darkside young aniken, it is easier than the banality of truth. existance(resistance) being futile, the ability to overcome is what's shifty.

any marriage done in by a single infedelity was only looking with traffic on one way streets as it crossed them.

we are all playing the same game, and it is only the players' abilities for strategy which so greatly range that checkers can appear to you as chess.

i've always felt guilty winning and sore losing,

thats why i keep giving away my playbook;

i prefer stalemates.

the pain IS in the intent, not that the intent must be hurtful, just inconsiderate.

you aren't putting anything off, you are fucking living through it.

i've never asked anyone to be unhappy, alls i'm saying is that socrates and buddha were beggars.

p.s. for the pc pop: Whose opinion is more valid when seeking safe passage across a busy intersection? A crossing guard or a fucking blind guy?

can an opinion be wrong? yes. can it be right? yes. Can a valid opinion be wrong? yes. Can an invalid opinion be right? yes....... the meanings of words are in the dictionary.

can you tell the difference between something actually not being there and not being able to see it?

can you tell the difference between reality and perception?

perception and deception?

advice for EVERYONE

a) stop using words you don't understand... eg retraction, revert.
b) ban babies, big ones too.
c) at first you've got these romantic ideas like you're an eagle or lion, but you are domesticated, so you may as well own yourself or someone else will.
d) when you are finally covering your own ass and pulling your own weight, start complaining, it's not a privilege or a right, it's your final responsibility.